"Your mom is like a fine wine; poured down my chest and licked off."
"These enchiladas are delicious! Too hot to shovel into my mouth!"
"Your mom is too hot to shovel into my mouth."
Your mom’s not backed by physics.
Your mom can put ANYTHING everywhere.
Submit a Mom of the Month!
Submit a pic of your mom, or any mom who looks particularly motherly! :P
"When your mother asks, ‘Do you want a piece of advice?’ it is a mere formality. It doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no. You’re going to get it anyway."
— Erma Bombeck
Your mom is so promiscuous, your family tree is recursive.
"Hey, go to the gates of hell."
"I saw your mom at the gates of hell."
"Oh, no. You didn’t. Not my mom. She wouldn’t be caught dead there."